14 Reasons Why Batman’s My Dream Man

Jill Pantozzi | December 2nd, 2010

(BEWARE: Adult content to follow) It’s like DC Comics sent Ray Palmer and Zatanna on a secret mission into my brain. Palmer, to shrink them both down so I wouldn’t notice what was going on, and Zatanna to read my mind. In current DC continuity, there’s officially not one, but TWO Batmen running around the streets of Gotham. Two?! Can you imagine the possibilities? And I don’t mean for fighting crime. On second thought, I’ll just stick with the original, Dick doesn’t do it for me (that’s what she said.) Do you get where I’m going with this yet? No? Okay, let me spell it out for you: I WANT TO HAVE SEX WITH BATMAN.

No offense to Mr. Grayson but I’m in love with the man, not the suit. Well, ok, maybe the suit a little but it’s Bruce Wayne’s Batman I get all hot and bothered for. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I KNOW he’s a fictional character but trust me, I’m not the only person out there with the hots for him. Don’t ask me to tell you when it started because that would only freak you out more than this list is going to already. Let’s just say I’ve had an unhealthy obsession with the Caped Crusader for a long time.