Comic Craziness

March Madness? Who needs it? I’d rather take my chances with a comic book bracket any day.

In round one, Superman easily took down Thor and was then pitting against Green Lantern who first drowned Aquaman. He eventually went head-to-head with Wolverine who had taken down Spawn and Spider-Man. But of course Wolvie had nothing on the Big Blue Boy Scout who sits pretty as one of the final four.

Batman was up against Robin, who had no chance of winning whatsoever, then went on to face the Hulk who eventually turned back into Bruce Banner and went home crying. One of only two females on the list, Wonder Woman, was first paired with Daredevil. No contest there really. It was a tough call on who would face her in the next round as Captain America battled Iron Man. Sorry Cap, maybe after your movie comes out you’ll do better. Diana and Tony Stark ended with Tony on top, a position he’s not used to being in (if-you-know-what-I-mean-and-I-think-you-do). But as usual, Batman was the millionaire of choice in the end, making him our second superhero in the four.

Then came the villains. The Punisher could not punish Lex Luthor who advanced to take on Catwoman, but he already had the cat in the bag. He eventually went up against one of Batman’s rogues, The Riddler, who previously beat out Sabretooth and Doctor Octopus. Lex, being a genius, answered every riddle Edward Nigma ever had and took the first villain spot in the four.

A few tough calls in the second supervillain category. The Joker absolutely did not kneel before Zod and continued against the equally poisonous Venom in the next round, who was too confused by all the bright colors and gave up. If you can believe it, Green Goblin beat Two-Face and Doctor Doom beat Brainiac so it was Doctor Doom who finally had the impossible task of taking on the Joker. You know who had the last laugh.

So there you have it. In what won’t come as a great shock to anyone, the “Fantastic 4” are Superman versus Batman and Lex Luthor versus the Joker. Who’s archenemy is more popular? Will Superman be pitted against the Joker or Batman against Lex? Either way, my money is on Batman. Then again, what do I know about these bracket thingies. I don’t watch sports.